Sunday, February 15, 2009

I think I'm in love....
















Well if you know me I'm not a huge car guy! Pretty much if it can get me from point A to point B, then 'm cool with it. But when I met Jenny I was driving a black 70 Ford Mustang with a 351 Winsor, four barrel holly carburator, straight headers, removed the mufflers for a while, and this thing could peel out on the freeway. The rear suspension was slighlty lifted with some thick tires and the front appeared to be lowered just from the size of the rear tires...scraped up $1200 to buy it against everyones better judgement. Long story short I blew up the engine racing.....go figure right? I ended up selling it and my muscle car love has been dormant since...
Then I saw THIS!!!!!!!
Its a 2009 Dodge Challenger....OMG!!!! I'm trying to convince my wife its the perfect family car, mixing tradition and current technology.........yeah she aint buying it either....

Economical? Who cares!
MPG? Who cares!!
Comfortably sits 4 people? Who cares!!!
Cost? Who cares!!!!
I'm in love!!

Friday, February 6, 2009

1 Way Up date....

Okay its been a busy month and I don't see it slowin down just yet. Thank you for everyone who has helped out in one way or another through prayer and time. Everything has been a learning process for me and my familia. It's alot to juggle and keep in front of me, but through God's grace have I had the privelage of moving forward. Rick Bambrick!! Thank you for words of encouragement and advice...I'm taking you out to diner with Mike to pull more info out of you! Taxes suck!! I said Taxes not Texas....easy Charlie...
Richie! Thanks for helping out some of my customers with your hot wire touch! We'll hang out and smoke some peaches with Joe. Maybe this weekend we can all get together...just chill.
Gotta call Bubba so we can jam soon, I've got that bug now, gotta scratch that itch to make some music. Miss you guys!
Thank you to Jenny, my beautiful wife, for putting up with my sh#$.. and long hours...don't worry babe..just because we can't see where we're going doesnt mean were going the wrong way...we'll get there. I don't know everything there is to know about things but I know how to keep working toward these wide open doors. Just don't want my closest doors to close first. I've had the pleasure and blessing of having great people as friends, I miss everyone like crazy...so dissconnected lately..
Psalm 131
My heart is not proud, O Lord,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things to wonderful for me.
But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.

Thank you everyone!!!! Miss my lifegroup, Bible study and friends over at LBRM and Kingdom Causes. I should be getting back in the mix soon enough here....c u guys....


Friday, January 30, 2009

The struggle within...


This tattoo reminded me of a story from India I wont soon forget...


A boy had told someone that he constantly had nightmares of two wolves fighting...
One was bad and other was good...and they were fighting to keep him...
The strongest one would win...
The boy then asked...which one will win?
He was afraid the bad wolf would win and take him away...
They calmly told him, "the one you feed the most."


I have to remind myself to keep feeding the good one too...not just myself... :)



Friday, January 16, 2009

Doubt.

Here it is…it was a chilly night. The count was 3-2, it’s the bottom of the eighth inning and we are down by 1 point. The pitcher throws and it is perfect, it’s almost in slow motion right down the middle….but I hesitated. In a split second the ball flies by and it’s a strike…I didn’t swing. I struck out. We ended up losing the game….did I mention the bases were loaded? Uhh yeah…I was about 12yrs old.
You can imagine the brain trip in my 12 yr old head…It was bad and I was confused. What happened? Why didn’t I swing? Why did I choke?
Doubt. I doubted myself and that’s all it took.
See today, there are moments that are like being up to bat and feeling the weight of the pressure and all I have to do is doubt again….and I miss the “swing.” It could be a hundred different scenarios but a few days ago, I doubted myself again…. Again the head trip was bad..
You see, I began to question everything, everything…around me, close to me and just me… My thoughts were just scattered leading to some serious confusion!! What am I so afraid of that leads to this doubt? I’ve asked God to stretch me and challenge me for growth. Christ gives me these moments to make the choice. The choice that I’m supposed to make when the opportunity is there, I just need to accept it, without doubt.

James1:6-8 “But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord, he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.”

A wave at sea? Unsettled and restless….that would be me. I was being tossed around in my questioning. But something remained that I completely pushed aside…my faith. I know not to doubt that!!! Then why don’t I rely on that…on Him. What else could be less confusing then having a rock like that. Don’t want to be tossed around anymore, don’t want to question anymore, don’t want to doubt anymore…just want to make the right choice he prepared for me.
So now I’m praying for strength, wisdom and courage again…that my choice reflects that and not me. What’s in me is false. What’s in Him is true. So I pray for another opportunity to not limit myself in just what I know. To move past the lie and the confusion..and to just know to unlimit myself through Him.
My God, give me your strength and wisdom to get back in the batters box…..set my feet..…keep my eye on the ball……and swing.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Long Beach Rescue Mission....

Friday nights message at the mission was about being thankful. It was pretty cool to hear Gene's testimony and experiences from Vietman and about being "touched" by angels in the worst of moments. He questioned his own mortality in varies situations and asked why was he lived through some of these moments. I know alot of the guys sitting there could really relate to some of those experiences. Thank you Gene!
The message of thankfulness was given by Richie. I've heard Richie give a message in India but he blew me away on Friday with his message on being thankful. He started out talking about what we generally think are things to be thankful for like our family, our homes, but quickly made the point to the audience that these things are just material and that there is something greater to be thankful for.
1. Thankful for and it's okay to be "weak." "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecution, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
- 2 CORINTHIANS 12:9
The best part about this is that we often feel weak. Life comes at us hard and unexpected, I (we) feel weak, we can't carry some of this stuff all the time, we just can't, believe me I've tried! The last time I checked the self help industry is a multi million dollar machine. Does it satisfy? Maybe for a little bit but it never lasts, so we just bury this stuff. When it creeps up we just push it back down, never letting it go. No matter what the "outside" says, inside we're a mess! God is our strength.
2. Thankful that He cares. "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." - 2PETER5:7
Religion by itself is a belief with no power. Having a personal relationship with God is when His power becomes your strength. Who else knows you better? He's been with us through every step even when we don't want Him. He'll carry our worries because we know he cares.
3. Thankful I'm forgiven. " If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." - 1 JOHN 1:9
Thats a tough one. Forgiven? I can't seem to forgive myself on so many levels, but He has already forgiven me. Jesus died not for the righteous but the unrighteous, they didn't take his life, he gave it as a sacrifice, to take our place, to carry our sins so that we may be forgiven. It's definetly not to say we will never sin again, but He's forgiven us for things we've done and things we're going to do. We still need to recognize our tendencies to sin and rely on His power to overcome it.
4. Thankful He will never leave me. "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." - DEUTERONOMY 31:6
Never leave me or forsake me. If one thing I do know for sure is that people leave. People I've loved and still love are no longer in my life. Through whatever circumstances I've felt the pain of being left or separated from relationships. It sucks. I'll leave that there for now. :(
5. Thankful he loves me/us. " But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." - ROMANS 5:8
Jesus died for us not because we were good enough, but because He loved us. For a time in my life, I didn't even want God, but He wanted me. I pushed Him away and He waited. I fought Him and He never fought back, He just loved back. How could I not be thankful for this kind of love?
Gene, Richie, you guys were great! Paul thanks for playing guitar with me, we have to get together again! It was a fun night. For anyone interested in serving at the LBRM, let me know good things always come out of it..I am truly thankful for what God has given me/us.