UPDATE ON JOSE CRUZ..

Thank you all who prayed for Jose and his family during this time when things don't go the way we want. Unfortunately, these times are tough and on saturday morning we had to layoff Jose... I was worried about his reaction, his emotions, his family, him! What was he going to do? What can I do to help? Can this be prevented or postponed? I was consumed..with every thought you could imagine.. Well his reaction said everything...
When he found out, he calmly gathered his thoughts and through teary eyes said "I have faith in God and I know that this will be an uphill battle for me, but God will not leave me or dissapoint me. He will be with me during this time. I don't want to go through this but if God does, he will see me through and I will go in faith." Can you believe that? His response was of somebody not losing something, but gaining something.
This made me think you of few things. Why do we really follow God? When things are good, God is great, when things go bad, where is God?
"Why, O Lord, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?"Psalm 10:1
"How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?" Psalm 13:1-2
How many of us feel like this, even right now? But God is good, right? I guess we picture goodness as being synonymous with safety. Life and the mess that comes with it are everything but safe. Our faith is definetly found in our response to loss and suffering and why we follow God. I follow God because he is real, no matter what I go through, good or bad.
I can think back at some of the worst moments of my life, when I wanted to feel nothing, think nothing and be nothing... In those moments nothing mattered, I wanted them to go away:( But today I look back and would never want anyone to take away those times because they made me who I am today. Even though I didn't believe it then, God was...with me and with us.
The Bible says "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perserverance; perserverance character, and character hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."
Cruz, I know you'll read this, you told me a while ago how we're all auditioning for a show with God as the director. This life is not about us and we are not the main characters. Some of us will be cut at the end of the audition and some will stay. Its not about what we want because were not in control of the show. I'm sure your new role will be better than the one you're leaving, I'm going to miss you here bro..

Spotlight on...Jose Cruz Jr.

Just so you know, about 8years ago the first time I met Cruz he was standing on a dock in Torrance with a "wife beater" tank top, covered in more tattoos than I care to remember, staring me down like I stole his wallet. He walked up to me and the first thing he tells me is "Let me tell you about respect.." He was the night supervisor at the time and just to spare you the details he wasn't exactly the friendly type..Wow, how things have changed.

Today, I can't imagine my time at work without Jose. You see, I believe nothing is by accident and God places people in our path for a reason.

This is an example of who he is today. "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin." I'm whispering "I was lost," Now I'm found and forgiven. When I say..."I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it. When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain, I have my share of heartaches So I call upon His name. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not holier than thou, I'm just a simple sinner who received God's good grace, somehow.. "

You see, I have the pleasure of experiencing his friendship and walk with Christ along with mine. Is it difficult to carry the cross? YES it is! The gift Jose brings to any conversation or "counseling session" always starts with "the Bible says....." and rarely a "Well, I think..." He is so knowledgable in the Word that sometimes what he says just stings sometimes, but it is the truth, directly from the Bible. I admire his Faith and his willingness to share and pray ANYWHERE!

Unforunately, like an active believer, he is hurting right now to stay up. He is fighting right now even as you read this, for his wife, his kids, his job, his future and he needs prayer. We may go to different churchs, but we know we are all connected through Christ. Life just goes wrong sometimes, right? Sometimes through our bonehead moves or sometimes through circumstances out of our control, we need to lift each other up in the process. There is enough crap around us to knock us down! "Knowing" just isn't enough sometimes, we constantly need each other to stay focused and take these hits. Our hearts are always being broken, molded, reshaped, rebuilt, all in an effort to get closer to Him. Cruzer thank you for being you and helping me keep my head on straight when I need it. You are an amazing person, bold, and ALL heart! What would I do without you? Luv ya bro!

India trip 2008